What is so important about the interaction between Ron and
Oskar?
Why is Oskar so interested in Gerald's daughters and his
relationship with them?
What does Oskar mean when he refers to digging up his dad's
coffins as "a simple solution to an impossible problem"?
Why isn't his mom angry or curious about his late night trip
to the cemetery?
His mother tells him that his dad had called her. What does
this do for Oskar? Why doesn't he share with her about the messages he hid from
her?
What does Oskar's reversal of the pictures and the imagined
reversal of time remind you of?
The chapter was entitled "Beautiful and True".
What is beautiful and true about this chapter?
28 comments:
I believe Oskar's mom senses that he still needs closure. Putting an empty box into the ground wasn't enough. He needed to further examine his father's life and grow as a person. This event is one of the main things that allows Oskar to slowly move on. When Oskar hears that his dad called his mom, he is shocked to say the least. He didn't know that his mom had received a call either. Oskar's mom knew that Oskar was the one to hear the messages, she knew in the back of her mind that Oskar heard the "last messages". Although they weren't meant for Oskar hear.
For the entire novel Oskar has not liked Ron because he felt that by Ron being around, his mom could not miss his dad. During this conversation Oskar finds out that Ron has lost his wife and his daughter. This is important because now Oskar sees something in common with Ron, now that they have common ground it allows them the possibility of developing a future relationship. Having something in common draws people together and creates friendships and relationships. During the conversation Oskar's mom interrupts and gives Ron a way out of answering Oskar's questions to try and make Ron feel less uncomfortable but Ron chooses to answer them. This shows us what kind of person he really is and that he cares about Oskar and wants to get to know him and to help Oskar work through the loss of his father.
Reading about how Ron and Oskar interact makes it obvious how Oskar doesn't want to like Ron because he feels Ron is trying to take his father's place, later on finding out this is not the case. Ron knows what Oskar may be feeling and wants to be able to help if he could, a sympathetic hand if you will, same goes for his mom. I feel that Oskar's mom let's Oskar go to the cemetery because it will help bring closure to Oskar. Oskar mentions on several occasions that it's just an empty box that was buried, not his dad. By him digging up the grave and putting something in there that holds meaning it is giving that empty box another meaning for Oskar. It brings him some type of closure.
When Ron first appeared in the story, Oskar wanted nothing to do with him. He thought that his mom had moved on from his dad already and was already happy with someone else. Oskar believed that you must either be always happy or always sad, that you must be laughing or crying. This childlike perspective caused him to resent Ron and also his mom. When he finds out about the loss of Ron's family, he understands that they are helping each other grieve and cry, but can also help each other laugh and be happy. After Oskar opens up his father's coffin and fills it, Oskar tells him mom that it's ok if she falls in love again. This shows that Oskar is beginning to move on and letting his mom as well.
The interaction between Ron and Oskar gives Oskar a newfound respect for Ron after learning what Ron has gone through and what he has experienced. Oskar learns that the two aren't so different and that they have both lost loved ones. Oskar is interested in Gerald's relationship with his daughters because he wants to know how much he values his kids and when Gerald tells Oskar about his daughters it makes Oskar think what his dad remembered about him. I also believe it also reveals that Oskar could feel the love of his father by Gerald telling Oskar about his daughters and showing his love. When Oskar refers to digging up his dad's coffin as "a simple solution to an impossible problem" I believe he is saying that by digging up his father's coffin he will get closure and it will ease his "heavy boots", and the impossible problemn is that his dad is dead and there is no way to bring him back to life. Oskar could also be referring to the coffin being empty and their task to fill it with something that would be like dad.
Oskar's mother is not mad at Oskar for going to the cemetery to dig up his father's grave because she realizes that this will give Oskar some closure and may help ease his pain. Being a loving mother, she cannot fault him for his acts as she feels pain too. As Oskar's mother reveals to him that dad called her on his last day this allows Oskar to gain a little more respect for his mother as to see what both of them are going through and to also ease Oskar's regret for not answering the phone as he may now know what his father would have said to him. Oskar decides not to tell mother about the hidden messages of his father because this may only make her pain worse and he decides to spare her that suffering. Oskar's reversal of the pictures was the same as his grandmother's dream. By going backwards everything became alright and nothing bad happened. Oskar's thoughts and his grandmother's dream paralleled one another.
The interaction between Oskar and Ron is what I would call simple yet complicated. Simple because Oskar does not like Ron and has a mindset that he is a replacement for his dad. Going more in depth though, there are complications that make their relationship unsteady and unfriendly on one side. Oskar is like any other human being; He doesn’t want someone he loves to be forgotten or replaced. I think we can all relate to that, especially when it’s someone we care deeply about. That kind of relationship is very common for children who loses a parent or even parents who get divorced. When Oskar finds out that Ron had lost his wife and child too, it definitely changes Oskar's feelings towards him. He realizes that Ron and his mom are confiding in one another because they went through tragic times and can relate. When Oskar finds this out, he comes to terms with the fact that Ron isn’t the bad guy. He’s not trying to steal his mother and his mother isn’t trying to move on with Ron and forget about his dad. After that revelation, Oskar has a new respect and understatement for Ron.
One believes that Oskar describes digging up his fathers coffin as "a simple solution to an impossible problem" for many reasons. One because he wants to know if his father had actually died in the terror attacks. Oskars whole life revolves around him accomplishing problems, solving mysteries, and gaining self closure. By him digging up his fathers coffin, it helps him to know that his dad wasn't actually buried in it. That solved one of the questions in Oskars mind. However the impossible part comes when more questions flow into his mind. Like, "how did dad die", " what was he doing when IT happened". Those are the impossible questions that Oskar cannot simply answer by digging up his fathers empty grave.
Oskar is interested in Gerald's family to see if they are close with each other. After experiencing the loss of his dad and finding the lock to the key which made his relationship with his mom move farther away, Oskar wants to make sure that Gerald loves his family. When Oskar refers to digging his dad's grave as "a simple solution to an impossible problem", he means that filling the coffin with letters and some other memories of his father will feel closure in his life. Being an impossible problem means that no matter what happens, death is a permanent thing and cannot be reversed. The reason why this was Beautiful and true is that disastrous events in life will always heal on its own. People have to let grieving take its own course through their lives. At the end, people will have a better understanding of life. Oskar lets himself move on as well as his mom move on so that they can love again. Oskar's grandmother and grandfather move on by staying at the airport where time is irrelevant as everyone is going and leaving just like how they lived their lives.
I agree with Abigail in the situation between Ron and Oskar. They have both suffered great loss. In my opinion, one never truly understood the other untill they knew the truth. Oskar seems to open up his feelings because he now has a strong connection with Ron, because they have both suffered great loss, and they now understand the connection between the both of them. Oskar is blasting Ron with questions and Oskar's mother notices and tries to relieve Ron, but he continues to answer Oskar, which shiws that he really does care about him abd his feelings.
Throughout the entire novel, Oskar despised Ron. He was mad at his mother for being with Ron. He was mad at the idea of his mother loving Ron. Oskar saw it as a betrayal to his dad for his mom to love someone else. The significance of the interaction between Ron and Oskar in the final chapter is that Oskar reaches a new realization and understanding. Ron has also suffered the loss of loved ones. Oskar realizes that Ron isn't some random guy off the street, but someone who shares a similar pain and suffering that he does. Oskar realizes that he's not alone.
When Oskar’s mother tells him that his dad had called her it gave him the comfort that he no longer had to protect his mom. For most of the story he was so guarded because he felt he had to protect his mom from the messages, which a young boy should never have to do. He doesn’t share with her about the messages he hid from her because he knows that she knew about the messages and that the messages were for him. He knew his mom told his dad that he was home so his dad was calling to talk to Oskar not to his mother.
Ron and Oskar have both lost someone and both comfort Oskar’s mom. Before Oskar knows about Ron’s similarities to him, Ron stands as someone to fuel Oskar’s need to find his dad. Once Oskar learns that Ron had lost his wife and daughter, Ron becomes someone that Oskar can connect with. His mom isn’t angry about his trip to the cemetery because she knows that Oskar needs closure. He was a young boy who lost the most important person in his life and needed to start healing. Hearing that his dad called his mom gives Oskar some peace. He had been keeping messages a secret from his mom for so long, and now he knows that not only did she have her own messages, but that she got to speak with her husband. Some of the guilt Oskar had about his father’s last words is eased because he knows that his dad got to speak to his mother. I think that he doesn’t share the messages with his mother because he doesn’t want to tarnish the last words she had. When his mother and father spoke, his dad lied and said everything was okay, and even though they both knew that that wasn’t the case, it’s a lot better than the last message that Oskar had to listen to.
Oskar’s exchange with Ron is important, because it represents acceptance. After digging up his father’s grave and seeing it empty again, it made everything seem so real to him. When he learns that Ron lost his family as well and that he and his mother were in a support group together, he realizes that he didn’t know everything he should before he was prejudice against Ron. Oskar also accepts that his mother might fall in love again, even though she tells him that she never will. Oskar doesn’t believe her, and she doesn’t know if she believes herself either, but she did love his father more than she will ever love anyone else. This chapter is beautiful and true because it shows Oskar coming to terms with reality and accepting the truth of his father’s death, and that he no longer has to invent ways that he died. It is beautiful that he will now find new things to invent.
I agree with Alyse when saying that Oskar accepts Ron now. He figured that Ron was a completely random guy which makes his mom seem like an even worse person. Knowing Ron's story, Oskar now realizes that his mom is trying to cope with Thomas's death. The messages that Thomas left Mom shows that Oskar and her have a common ground now when it comes to Dad. That he now has someone close that has always been there and was just waiting for him to come to her. What I found sort of weird though is how come no one talks about anything but everyone knows everything? I feel like if I was a mom or grandma, I'd be all up in my kid's business especially if we lived in New York, and even if I knew what my kid was doing, I'd still ask anyway.
The interaction between Oskar and Ron is important because it helps give Oskar a new perspective. Oskar believed that he didn't like Ron, but in reality he didn't like the idea of Ron replacing his father. Once he understood Ron's situation, Oskar realized he actually had something in common with him. This also helped him to be closer with his mom, because all of this time he was mad at her because he thought she was replacing his dad. Once he realized his mom just needed someone to talk to and relate with, he felt at peace with their friendship.
Oskar and Ron’s interaction is very important because, for the first time, Oskar can relate and understand Ron. Oskar refers to digging up the coffin as a simple solution to an impossible problem because since he can never have his father back, the problem is impossible, but digging it up is a simple solution to become more grounded with it. Knowing that Oskar’s dad called his mom most likely relieved him because he wouldn’t have to fret about not being there to pick up.
The interaction between Ron and Oskar was important because for the whole book Oskar never liked seeing Ron with his mother. He could have been mad to see his father replaced with his mother's "friend". When Oskar asked about Ron's family setup a foundation of trust and showed their similarities. the reason why his mother wasn't angry or curious of his trip is to let him grieve and find closure in his own way. When Oskar found out that his father called his mother it defiantly brought him relief and made him less upset for not telling her in the first place about the voicemails.
"a simple solution to an impossible problem"
Oskar's an atheist so to him, there's nothing beyond the physical world. He misses his dad so the simple solution would be to dig him up so his body is with Oskar. It's an impossible problem because the body is just cells and there's no possible way with Oskar's beliefs for him to be with his dad ever again.
Throughout the entire book Oskar never liked Ron. He felt like his mom was replacing his dad with a "friend." Oskar realizes that he and Ron have something in common. The interaction between the two of them sets up the base of trust and a start of a relationship. His mom isn't angry about the late night trip to the cemetery because she feels like her son still needs closure, and this is how he is going to get it. She isn't curious about the trip either because she has already made closure on the situation, especially with the help of Ron.
The most important part of the dynamic relationship between Ron and Oskar is their road to recovery. Although Oskar dislikes him for averting his mother's attention, he realizes that Ron has experienced similar loss. I think that Oskar's mother is not angry over his late night trip to the cemetery because it helps Oskar connect with his father's memory and relinquishes some of the pain and grief that Oskar suffers without his father. Also, I think that she is not curious because she is aware of Oskar's desire to fill the void that still lingers.
This chapter really demonstrates how quickly Oskar is recovering because it shows that he is finally starting to sympathize, understand, and accept other people. When he learns about Ron's loss, he has shared a similar experience. When he learns about his mother's phone call, he has shared a similar experience. He can finally stop being angry and realize that life isn't "worse for him" like he said to Dr. Fein during his counseling session. Also, I don't think that Oskar's mother is angry because she was aware of what he was doing. Throughout the entire book, Oskar thought he was sneaking around New York but she knew the entire time. I highly doubt that this night of sneaking out is an exception to her all-knowing eye. She knew that he would be safe with his grandfather and accepted that he would do what he needed to do and come home.
The reversal of the pictures and reversal of time done by Oskar reminds me of when everyone had a VCR, and all you had to do is press rewind and you could see the whole movie backwards. With this rewind button you could see everything therefore you knew what was going to happen even if you never saw the movie. Now for Oskar, he has lived through the "movie" and all he wants to do is hit the rewind button.
This rewind button would give him the feeling over security and happiness. He wanted to change the outcome, but we obviously know that is not possible. Although for Oskar, anything is possible.
His mom is not angry or curious about the coffin because she knew what he was going to do, I guess she thought it would help him get some closure. The reversal of time daydream was horribly depressing to me because it implies that while the grandparents got to mend their relationship and the mother got to finally let go and cry over her loss, Oskar never moved on. His last thoughts to us are him inventing a daydream which can not possibly exist. Instead of finally trying to go out into the world and except his fathers death he stops right before his epiphany and stays in a state of unhealthy preoccupation about something he could never have changed for the rest of his life.
Oskar from the very beginning of the novel has found it difficult to accept Ron into his mother's life. He sees him as a replacement father that he does not want. Towards the end of the reading, Oskar learns why his mother and Ron have bonded so well together; they both lost family. I think this is a turning point in Oskar's mindset, he realizes that so many others are dealing with the loss of loved ones and cope in their own ways. It's selfish to take away the comfort two people can share by having similar experiences. Oskar realizes that same comfort, when Ron admits he cries often over the death of his wife and child. This is so important to the novel as Oskar is getting better little by little, he is maturing and accepting the situation at hand. It may not be a major improvement, but the slight change in attitude is a start to a healthier life for Oskar.
Oskar from the very beginning of the novel has found it difficult to accept Ron into his mother's life. He sees him as a replacement father that he does not want. Towards the end of the reading, Oskar learns why his mother and Ron have bonded so well together; they both lost family. I think this is a turning point in Oskar's mindset, he realizes that so many others are dealing with the loss of loved ones and cope in their own ways. It's selfish to take away the comfort two people can share by having similar experiences. Oskar realizes that same comfort, when Ron admits he cries often over the death of his wife and child. This is so important to the novel as Oskar is getting better little by little, he is maturing and accepting the situation at hand. It may not be a major improvement, but the slight change in attitude is a start to a healthier life for Oskar.
Oskar originally hates Ron because he sees him as just a replacement for his father. Oskar doesn't understand how his mom could do that. Oskar eventually learns that Ron also deals with loss and Oskar realizes that he isn't the only person in the world who goes through this and that he doesn't have to do it alone
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